Increasing Hope, Confidence, and Competence

I am amazed that one year can contain the highest highs and the lowest lows. This year, I lost my 16-year-old brother, Sam, dealt with the COVID-19 pandemic and all its frustrating repercussions, felt torn politically between friends and family on both sides of important issues, had COVID, bought our first house, and most importantly, my wife and I welcomed our sweet angel baby girl into the world! The general craziness of 2020 is miniscule compared to the pain of dealing with my brother’s suicide. In the wake of all those life-altering experiences, it's safe to say that healing has often been very difficult for my family and I. Still, with the help of my wife and adorable baby, I have frequently found myself overwhelmed by greater joy than I have ever before experienced. So, today I wanted to write this post to address some main reflections I’ve had this past year, including some things I’ve learned about myself, trauma, mental illness, suicide prevention, and healing. As always...

My angel Mother hosted a Teen discussion to help the youth in the fight with suicide and to give guidance to those who are seeking for peace regarding Sam's death. She is amazing and I love her so much for putting her whole heart and soul into inspiring hope, building confidence, and helping others develop a greater competence to conquer the darkness surrounding so many. We will not be silent about suicide! No one needs to suffer alone!  To help with the discussion,  Mom put together a list of suggestions based on our family's experiences. These are things that we know did help Sam when he was applying them, along with things we feel could have helped him had he chosen to stay. Many of these points also apply to those who wish to help friends who might be suffering. They are simple but meaningful suggestions that can be applied by anyone seeking for greater hope, confidence, and competence. We are all in a fight to save lives. Please feel free to share these suggestions with a...

March 13, 2020. That was the day. We  never could have comprehended the  drastic impact that date would have on the trajectory of our lives. March 13, 2020 was the day my 16 year old brother, Sam, was overwhelmed by obsessive darkness and chose to end his life.   Because of his outgoing personality and infectious energy, most who knew Sam were baffled to learn that he was privately fighting a continuing battle with depression. This picture taking our littlest brother Spencer hunting just days before his death is the last we have of him. Sam, while far from perfect, had a remarkable gift of helping others, young and old, feel important. He was just so good at making people smile. Losing him has left a gaping hole in our mourning family and in the lives of those who had been touched by his love.  All of us know individuals who have experienced the soul-crushing gloom of depression. It may be you. It may be a sibling. Maybe it’s a classmate whose light seems t...