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Suicide Is NOT The Answer - Please choose to stay (4-5 Min Read)

There is so much we do not know about suicide. We don't know all the details of what happens when someone leaves this life. Trust me, I would love to ask my brother, Sam, what he was thinking when he took that step... But we just can't understand all the reasons why someone would make such a drastic and permanent decision. And really, a lengthy discussion trying to find answers to some of those unanswerable questions just isn't very helpful or effective. However, I want to be absolutely clear in regards to suicide. Suicide is NOT the answer. My brother made a mistake - A permanent and tragic mistake. 

Suicide is NOT an easy way out. Many people, including my brother, feel that they are in darkness. They begin to feel that the pain will never go away in this life, so they mistakenly reason that ending their life is the only way for relief. That couldn't be more false! The decision my brother made to end his life was not okay. It was a mistake that he made being very, very sick. His mind was in a fragile state. His mental condition is only to be fully understood by Heavenly Parents and our loving Savior, who have perfect and infinite mercy, love, and understanding. Still, the decision he made was a mistake.

To my students, friends, family, and all others who find themselves contemplating harming themselves, I beg you from the bottom of my heart to never, ever make that choice, no matter how dark and painful life seems to be. “Whatever your struggle, my brothers and sisters—mental or emotional or physical or otherwise—do not vote against the preciousness of life by ending it! Trust in God. Hold on in His love. Know that one day the dawn will break brightly and all shadows of mortality will flee. Broken minds can be healed just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed. While God is at work making those repairs, the rest of us can help by being merciful, nonjudgmental, and kind” (Elder Jeffrey R Holland, "Like a Broken Vessel").

Healing comes to our minds, the light of hope reignites, miracles happen, and peace can be found DURING this mortal life. I do not understand God’s timing for when those gifts of healing and peace come, but I do know that it is simply not true that God has planned for any of His children to end their life by suicide. Please, please, hold on. Help will come. In God’s timing and in His way, you will be made whole. You, and certainly those you love, will be profoundly grateful that you did not make the decision to end your life. Please, choose to stay. I wish so badly that I could hold my brother in my arms and beg him to make that choice; that choice to stay, not only for himself, but for me, for our family, and for so many others who love him dearly. It breaks my heart to see 9-year-old Spencer without his closest brother and my incredibly strong Mom unwinding because the pain is so relentless. I cry when I remember that he is not here to hold my daughter, his sweet baby niece who will grow up without fully knowing her uncle Sam - His infectious laugh, his quick smile, and his pure love. We love him and miss him more than words can express.  

Suicide is not the answer. From a family tortured by the hole that exists because of suicide, please, please choose to stay. 


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